Thank You, President Trump!

Joyful woman
Photo by Ivana Cajina on Unsplash

You were so right! We were getting nervous and afraid as we watched friends and relatives succumb to the virus, but you kept saying we were turning a corner. We believed you and were heartened.

And now we have really turned a corner. In November over 4 million people tested positive. In October it was only half of that. We’ve turned the corner!

They say it’s not going the right way. Fake news!

People say don’t get sick, because there won’t be any place to put you and nobody to take care of you. If only we could get rid of those Democrats everyone would see it’s all a hoax! Even the people who are dying in South Dakota say so!

It will all change in two weeks when the millions of people who traveled for Thanksgiving show the CDC that they were wrong. How dare they tell us not to go see our families and loved ones. Things will get back to normal soon. F*ck your masks and social distancing! This is America! Land of the free!

The vaccines will be here any moment and save us, and it’s all thanks to President Trump and Operation Warp Speed. There’s nothing he can’t do if he puts his mind to it. He’s a genius! After all he’s done, he deserves a little vacation on the golf course. Everything’s under control. He says so.

There’s no reason we can’t all get vaccinated right away. They’ll figure out how to keep that medicine at a zillion degrees below zero and get it to us before New Years. It’s going to be cold outside anyway. This is America, and we can do anything!

MAGA hat
Photo by Aubrey Hicks on Unsplash



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Mary Morrison

Mary Morrison

Mary Morrison is an itinerant traveler and super procrastinator who published her first book at age 68.